1921

Chapter 23

Sunny Sunday, July [-]th

it's too hot.

Staying in the air-conditioned room almost does not want to go out.

The sun is scorching the earth. If you put an egg on it, it will be cooked immediately.

It's only July and it's so hot, how can we live in two months.

Strange customers who have been to the store before have become regular customers of the "old time", returning almost every day.On weekdays, I come in the evening, wearing suits and leather shoes. On weekends, the time is not fixed, and I am casual.Lin Jian has a very good relationship with him. From his mouth, I know the guest's name, Tao Shi.It is said that the two seem to have been classmates since high school.Seeing the two of them, I would think, does Ye Aichen and I look the same?

Sometimes when the state of mind changes, the attitude towards things and problems will also change accordingly.Although I still can't avoid my occasional exclusive thoughts, I'm finally getting myself used to living alone.It might not be obvious from the outside, but I know I'm headed in this direction.After I get used to it completely, I won't have so much trouble in my heart.

Life is a long journey belonging to one person.

After work, I went back to school to the library to review computer level two according to the usual arrangement. After the library was closed, I went back to the dormitory to wash up and play for a while, and then went to sleep.Life seems to be particularly easy when there are rules.

On the way back to the dormitory, I had a whim and planned to go for a run.As soon as he turned his footsteps, he walked towards the playground.

I hung my schoolbag on the net pole of the football field to make sure I could see it, stretched my muscles and bones, and started running.

The wind at night is not as hot as the day, and it becomes cooler, and the coolness blows on the face, which feels very comfortable.I didn't decide how many meters or how many laps I wanted to run, and I thought about following the fate, running as much as I could, and stopping when I didn't want to run.

I was a little tired at the beginning. After all, I haven't run for a long time. Who knew that the more I ran, the more excited I was, and I didn't want to stop.I didn't count how many laps I ran, and felt that as I ran, all the messy things in my mind disappeared with the wind, and I became more relaxed.

Finally, I forced myself to stop, because I felt that my body would not be able to bear it if I continued to run.

I stood still panting, did some relaxation movements, then walked to the ball frame to take off my schoolbag, put it on my back and prepared to go back to the dormitory.

I stood there with my schoolbag on my back without moving for a long time, as if I had no desire to move.I just stayed there quietly, I don't know how long it took, and suddenly I felt a heat in my eyes, touched my face, and found that I was crying.

Simply inexplicable.

It was fine just now, because I even felt my thoughts refreshed because of running, so what's going on with this state now?

I wiped away my tears, took a few steps in place, and then let myself lift my legs and walk to the dormitory.

Ignoring the panic and loneliness in my heart, I let myself think about other things.

Nothing, nothing, nothing.

I told myself.

It seems that if you say this to yourself, it’s really nothing.

Sunny Saturday, August [-]

On the Qixi Festival, love songs are played in the streets and alleys, and vendors selling roses can be seen everywhere on the streets.

Lin Jian prepared a bouquet of roses, saying that they would give one rose to each of the first thirteen customers who came to the store to buy books.In addition, there are [-] small snacks, which are given to guests who buy books with an amount of [-] yuan.

At first, I thought it was worthless to buy a 100 yuan book just to get a box of snacks, and I guess not many people would be willing.But another clerk told me that books are not cheap nowadays, like a collection of paintings, it may cost 50 yuan, so it is nothing if the amount of buying a book reaches [-] yuan, it is only a matter of two or three books.

"If you happen to come across a book you like, you may buy more." The clerk said, "It's like me, when I meet a book I like, I want to buy it all. How much does it matter?"

Such an analysis makes sense.

Because of the festival, Lin Jian closed the store in advance and gave everyone a rose for everyone to go to the festival.

Lin Jian and Tao Shi, who were waiting at the door, left, and the other shop assistants left happily holding roses. I stood at the bus stop in a daze while looking at the roses in my hand.

I don't think I will get married in my life.

I don't believe in marriage.

Therefore, there will be no love or anything.

Rather than two people quarreling over daily necessities, rice, oil, salt and ideas, it is better to live alone.

I don't like the noise of arguing.

I put the roses in the gap between the book and the bookshelf. The roommate who loves to play games came back and jokingly asked me which girl gave it to me. I said it was from our boss, and everyone has it.

"Then your boss is pretty good, today's roses are precious."

He seemed to come back to put things away, and went out after a while.

The other roommate seems to have a girlfriend. I saw him holding a girl's hand to say hello to me before. I guess he went to spend the holidays with his girlfriend today.

Ye Aichen...

Does Ye Aichen also have a girlfriend?

For example, the girl I saw downstairs that day.

Could that girl be "Zhang Junyue" who called him earlier?

Everyone grows up and will eventually go to different places.Ye Aichen will also fall in love, get married, have children, and like most people in the world, lead a happy life that belongs to him.I am just a passer-by in his life. Although the time we meet is a bit long, I will eventually pass by and go to different distant places, becoming a blurred image in the memory.

When Ye Aichen gets married in the future, will he invite me?

If he invites me, I must bless him with the brightest smile and the most sincere words, and thank him for taking care of him all the time.

Or, at that time, we have drifted away?

I turned on the computer and searched for a movie to watch. I turned off the headlights in the dormitory, only the shining light from the screen.

Tinkerbell in the movie messes things up but saves it all with her own creative genius.If everyone can test what their talents are at the very beginning, will they live a more purposeful life?Give full play to your abilities as much as possible and let yourself live a better life.

But, I think, people like me probably don't have any natural skills.

When the ending song of the movie played, someone came back, and the lights were turned on. I felt uncomfortable for a moment, closed my eyes, and heard Ye Aichen say, "I'm here."

I looked at him and nodded, turned off the player page, took off the earphones, sat for a while, and then took out the pajamas to wash up.

When I washed my hair, I found it was a bit long, so I should cut it in two days.

I dried my hair with a hair dryer, and Ye Aichen went to wash up.

He came out after washing and asked me if I had eaten. He ordered a family bucket just now, so we can eat together.

I came back directly after get off work and didn't eat, but I told Ye Aichen that I did.

"Oh... okay." Ye Aichen hung up the washed clothes, "But you can eat some more, I can't finish it all by myself."

When the takeaway arrived, Ye Aichen asked me to eat it, and I said I was still full, so I just let him eat.

The smell of food filled the bedroom, and I felt a little hungry.

I regret that I didn't buy something before, and now I am too embarrassed to go out to eat.

I went to get a glass of water to drink. After thinking about it, I planned to find another movie to watch. I guess I could go to sleep after watching it.

I found another series of the last movie to watch. The lively voice of the heroine came from the headset. Watching the funny pictures, I gradually became immersed in it and didn’t feel hungry.

After Ye Aichen finished eating, he opened the doors and windows for ventilation, and the smell of fried chicken in the dormitory gradually dissipated.

The movie was finally over, I turned off the computer, brushed my teeth, lay down on the bed and went to sleep.

Ye Aichen went to bed long before I went to bed.

After twelve o'clock, the other two roommates haven't come back yet, and they don't know when they will come back.

I was lying on the bed and couldn't sleep. I put my mobile phone on the desk under the bed. If I got out of bed to get it, the stairs would creak again. It would be bad if Ye Aichen was too noisy.

I silently belonged to sheep in my heart, and when I counted more than 200 sheep, Ye Aichen's voice suddenly sounded in the quiet bedroom.He whispered my name, "Wu Zi, are you asleep?"

I thought he was falling asleep, but when he interrupted me, I forgot how many I had counted.

"No." I also whispered.

"Shall we chat for a while?" Ye Aichen asked me.

I want to say that I'm going to sleep, because recently my communication with Ye Aichen has become less and less, I don't know what to chat with him, but when the words came to my mouth, they changed: "Okay."

"I'm a bit busy these days, and it feels like I haven't had a good conversation with you for a long time." Ye Aichen said, "By the way, what did you think about moving out as I told you last time?"

I've thought about this issue, but I haven't talked to Ye Aichen about it.

Although I was worried about money, I decided to move out of the dormitory and live outside. I wanted to have a room of my own.Although I can't afford a house right now, it's still possible to have a room.

"I've seen a few before, all around the school, and I think they're pretty good, and the price is okay. I'll send you a look back, and if possible, we'll go for a field trip."

"Ah."

"What are your plans after graduation?" Ye Aichen asked me.

Intend?I don't have any plans, my mind is just a mess, how can I have any plans?

Sometimes I feel like what's the point of living like this?I wanted to leave that family and have my own home, but I didn't even know what I wanted or what I wanted to do.Yes, it's just a very vague goal. I don't know what to do to achieve this goal.

I don't know what I like, I don't know what I can do, because I don't feel like I like anything in particular, and I don't have anything I can do.Such a me, what can I plan?

"I don't know." I said honestly.

"Anyway, it's still early, and there's still time to think about it slowly." Ye Aichen comforted me.

It would be great if I could really think about it.

It would be great if there are corresponding ABCD limited options for each stage of life, you don’t need to think too much, just pick one of them.But unfortunately, there are countless options here. Looking at it from another angle, there are no options at all.What to do with multiple choice questions with no options?I won't.

"I don't know what we will become in the future." Ye Aichen suddenly said with emotion, "Wu Zi, what kind of person will you fall in love with and marry?"

"I don't know." I said, "I don't think I will have such a day."

"You have never met someone you like? Or... Do you have any requirements or standards for your love object?"

"No." I thought for a while, but I couldn't think of it. I hadn't thought about it at all.

Ye Aichen seemed a little regretful, and then asked again: "I saw a rose on your desk, did you... buy it?"

I told him it was from the bookstore owner, and he seemed relieved, his tone lightened, and he joked, "I thought it was from a girl."

Speaking of this topic, I thought about it, and asked cautiously: "Then do you have someone you like? Or...are you dating now?"

Ye Ai was stunned for a moment, and then I heard him say in a serious tone: "Well, I have someone I like."

So, is that the girl he likes?

"But I haven't dated him." Ye Aichen added.

"Huh?" I was a little surprised, "The girl that day was..."

"Her? You mean the last time you met us downstairs?" Ye Aichen explained, "She's just my classmate, and she's my friend's girlfriend. That day she just came to get me Give me back what my friend borrowed from me before."

Feeling a little lighter inexplicably, "I thought she was your girlfriend."

"No." Ye Aichen said.

"Then who is the person you like?" After saying that, I realized that I had crossed the line a bit.I shouldn't have asked this kind of question.

Ye Aichen was silent for a while, I thought he didn't want to answer, and just about to change the subject, Ye Aichen said: "The person I like is a very good person, but he doesn't know it himself. He is very Stubborn, but also very forbearing, always want to carry everything alone. In fact, sometimes I really hope that he can rely on me, even a little bit, at least I can help him share part of it, so that he will not be so tired He is a person who always thinks about others and often ignores himself. No matter how uncomfortable he is, he will raise the corners of his mouth to tell others not to worry. Unless it is the kind of time when he really can't bear it, he will show his fragility a little bit unintentionally , he won’t let anyone know.” Ye Ai sighed, “He’s a bit stupid, a bit slow, but he’s very serious in his work. He’s a bit introverted, a bit silent, but he always listens patiently to what others say. He’s also a bit sensitive. , I want to care about him but I don't know what I should do so as not to hurt his self-esteem. Sometimes I see him sad but can't do anything. Maybe in the eyes of others, he is not good enough, he is just ordinary among all living beings But in my eyes, he is a unique existence. I know he is living very hard and living with heart. I really hope he can know that he is actually a great person, and he can be more confident. Live a little easier."

Is this the person Ye Aichen likes?

Listening to him, I can feel that he really likes that person.

"Then...why didn't you date her? Was...rejected?" I asked.

"No." Ye Aichen said, and it took a long time before he replied: "He didn't know that I liked him. I didn't tell him that I liked him. I don't think I will tell him in my life."

It turned out to be a crush!

I'm a little surprised.

I thought that a person like Ye Aichen should be easily liked by others.Why didn't he confess to the other party?Maybe the other party just happened to like him.

"But why don't you tell the other party what you want? Give it a try, maybe the other party likes you too."

Ye Aichen didn't speak.

In this silence, I thought, maybe I asked the wrong question.

I was really pushing my limits, Ye Aichen answered a question for me, and I actually got to the bottom of it, asking non-stop.If he didn't say it, he must have his own considerations.That is his decision, and no outsider can interfere.

"Isn't that right..." I was about to apologize when Ye Aichen interrupted me.Ye Aichen's tone was full of helplessness, and a little sad: "Because, he won't respond to this feeling, I know. I know, so I won't tell him, it will only increase his troubles."

I did not speak.

How much Ye Aichen liked that person, in order not to annoy him, he chose to remain silent.

Why does he like that person so much?Is that person really that good?

The person who can be liked by Ye Aichen must be a very good person, that's why Ye Aichen likes her so much.

Isn't it natural for good people to love good people?

I should bless Ye Aichen, and hope that the person he likes can notice his mood and respond to him.

But why do I feel my heart throbbing slightly?Why is the mood so low?

After a long time, Ye Aichen said: "It's late, go to sleep."

Our evening talk is over.

Neither roommate came back until I fell asleep.