Swimming pool

Chapter 72

Finally, I asked a question that I thought was ridiculous and sad, but at the moment I had no idea, and I wanted to know the answer:

"If Zhang Yimiao and I can only choose one, who do you choose?"

Cheng Lang wouldn't even ask this question because of the second person, because of disdain and boredom.He suddenly realized that since he changed his mind, he has fallen into a vicious circle of feelings. As long as he loves with his heart, there will always be a "third party" around him. Using the name of a friend interferes with his love.Let him have nowhere to argue.

Is this my destiny?Cheng Lang sneered.

He was a little afraid of this answer, because he really knew Li Boqiao, and a friend was almost a piece of backlash he couldn't touch.

what about me?Really can't compare with him?Thinking of this, Cheng Lang felt extremely sad.

Cheng Lang has never been so humble in love, why has he ever put himself with others for his lover to compare and weigh?When he quarreled with Zhang Jian back then, what he wanted was nothing more than a happy talk, not that he had to hold Zhang Jian and not let him go; as for Li Poqiao, Cheng Lang was not willing to part with him, he was really afraid that Li Poqiao would say Say something that disappoints you.

Li Boqiao was silent for a while, but still gave the answer: "Choose you." After he finished speaking, he frowned and said nothing.

Cheng Lang saw all this in his eyes, and was not satisfied because the answer was ideal.He knew Li Boqiao too well, and he knew that his answering in this way was really a coercive act, and it was definitely not his true will.

In Li Boqiao's eyes, friends are friends, lovers are lovers, and there is no conflict.He decided that Cheng Lang was "overthinking".

Sure enough, Li Boqiao still expressed his dissatisfaction: "I didn't tell you not to communicate with Shen Xianghui."

There was a trace of indignation in Cheng Lang's sharp eyes: "Li Boqiao, can you compare like this? Then let me tell you, if you ask, I can break off relations with him."

In fact, regardless of Li Poqiao's attitude, the thing that frustrates him the most in the whole incident is not Zhang Yimiao's disgust, but everyone may think that he is jealous of Zhang Yimiao and interferes with his normal contacts with Li Poqiao. It's a complete distortion of his nature.But Zhang Yimiao seems to deliberately lead everyone to this understanding.

If Cheng Lang really thought so, how could he tolerate Zhang Yimiao staying at home for so long?He is not someone who can rub sand in his eyes.But now who understands this truth?Even Li Boqiao misunderstood him.

"I won't be so boring." Li Boqiao said lightly.

He really doesn't like friends being criticized, even by his lover.Cheng Lang felt that Li Boqiao's mind was really unclear sometimes, and he tried his best to avoid the conflict between the two, not wanting to see the truth of the matter clearly.It's just a stubborn belief that something went wrong and both parties are responsible.

Neither of them mentioned Zhang Yimiao again, but the problem was obviously not resolved, such as Zhang Yimiao's fate.

That night, Cheng Lang went home with Li Boqiao, but he didn't see Zhang Yimiao. Maybe he was in his room, or he just happened to go out. Cheng Lang didn't ask, and he didn't bother to care. He came back to pick up things. .

Early the next morning, Cheng Lang packed some personal belongings and clothes into his handbag, and said to Li Boqiao, "I've been home for a few days recently."

torturous confrontation

Li Boqiao grabbed Cheng Lang's hand: "Don't be angry, okay?"

Cheng Lang shook his head. He understood that that sentence was equivalent to "Stop making trouble, okay?" Li Boqiao didn't understand where he was angry at all.

The skin held by Li Boqiao was hotter than other places, and every pore and every hair on it seemed to recognize each other, and they didn't want to separate once touched.

The two people's eyes met, and there was nostalgia and sadness in each other's eyes. Cheng Lang's heart suddenly beat wildly, and he realized that he couldn't look at Li Po Bridge carefully at this moment, otherwise he would probably rush forward or put down his luggage.

Many things drag on and get worse instead of going away on their own.A person who has been suppressed for too long does not mean that he can compromise to the end. On the contrary, he will be like a spring, rebounding strongly when he is suppressed to the extreme.

The two stood in a stalemate at the door for a few minutes, but Cheng Lang left without hesitation. Li Boqiao saw the door of his house closing quickly, and the door and the frame made a "bang" sound, and felt something slammed into it. In my heart, I suddenly felt a heart attack-unspeakable palpitation and throbbing pain.

He swallowed, sat down on the sofa, raised his head and closed his eyes.

If he had hugged him desperately in his arms just now, would he still leave?Or admit his mistake, can Cheng Lang change his mind?Li Boqiao shook his head, feeling that what he was thinking was meaningless—what did he do just now?

Li Boqiao found Cigarettes on the spot, and if he was not accompanied by Cigarettes at this time, he almost wanted to jump off the stairs.

As soon as Cheng Lang left, the whole house was empty.Yes, empty, even oneself does not exist.Li Boqiao's blank gaze suddenly shifted to the shelf next to the TV wall, on which was a clay doll of him and Cheng Lang kissing.

Li Boqiao can still recall the scene of that day with his eyes closed. The two sat together awkwardly under the bright noon sun. In fact, they both pretended to be each other in their hearts. kiss.Cheng Lang couldn't recall who kissed who first at that time.But Li Boqiao remembered very clearly that it was Cheng Lang who posted it before him, although he also moved forward at that time.Because of cowardice in his heart, he was afraid that Cheng Lang would be disgusted, so he was not so decisive.

Cheng Lang loves himself so much, the eyelashes at the corners of Li Boqiao's eyes trembled and were wet with tears, and finally couldn't resist the gravity of the earth, and slid down from his cheeks.

During the day, the two did not communicate with each other.When Cheng Lang returned to his den at night, he realized that the furniture in the room had already been covered with a thick layer of dust.Very good, at least when working, I don't think too much.

Western philosophers say that labor makes people forget their worries.Cheng Lang practiced it seriously.He dusted, swept the floor, wiped the table, mopped the floor, and took off the curtains and sheets and threw them into the washing machine.He kept busy, because his heart would feel cramped when he stopped.

It's like returning to the life of being alone again, but the state of mind has completely changed.

The sound of the rumbling motor seems to dispel the entanglement in the heart; the high-speed rotating pulsator seems to be able to spin all the pain away.However, when Cheng Lang sat quietly on the sofa, pressing the remote control to tune the channel, he was always thinking of someone in his heart.

His brain seems to have opened a personal photo album dedicated to Li Boqiao. No matter whether he is flipping through it randomly, the person who appears every time is him, with various postures and expressions, and he can even hear voices, perceive emotions and emotions. body temperature.

Zhang Yimiao's message under the newsletter that night came back to Cheng Lang's mind, and the more he thought about it, the sadder he became.After Li Boqiao passed, this circle of friends was deleted.But the deep hole was still there after the nail was pulled out, Cheng Lang couldn't ignore Zhang Yimiao's malice, let alone accept Li Boqiao's moderate position.

Cheng Lang thought resentfully: Maybe they can't compare, after all, they have known each other for more than [-] years, and he has only appeared in Li Boqiao's life for less than two years.

But Cheng Lang thought again unwillingly: Is it really incomparable? Isn't our relationship closer than friends?Are all the previous confessions and oaths false?Those unforgettable physical exchanges never really happened?Could it be that all the sweetness and longing are hallucinations, with just a few fingers pushing, they will immediately collapse and turn into dust?

At this moment, sitting on the soft couch in his living room, Cheng Lang truly felt an unprecedented feeling of loneliness and frustration.There used to be traces of Li Poqiao left here, the two hugged each other and watched TV together, Li Poqiao would kiss his hair, ears and neck calmly as he watched, and put his hands into his clothes to caress his skin, He would turn his head and stare intently, then press down and kiss him, and would directly put him down or hug him into the bedroom when his face was flushed.

They used to be so good, so loving, so complementary and harmonious, they were unified from heart to body, as long as Cheng Lang thought that all these intimacy, which had become a habit, might disappear completely from his life, his heart felt as if he was stuck. Big blood clots, breathless.

Many things do not need to happen in reality, as long as they are imagined, it will bring a heart-pounding sting. Cheng Lang suddenly realized that the flow of time has slowed down. Although he has done a lot of things, there is still a thick night outside the window, and there is no trace of it. light.

Cheng Lang knew that Li Boqiao's call would probably not come, so naturally he would not send WeChat.He knows him too well. Although Li Boqiao is more active in bed, he always chooses to avoid these difficult troubles in his life at the first time.

This is not the first time.

Cheng Lang knew that as long as he made a phone call, Li Boqiao would come to pick him up and take him home as if nothing had happened.But why should he take the initiative, why should he be soft, and why should he erase all the problems like a spider's thread?What did he do wrong?

Well, Cheng Lang likes to speculate, even if he can't slap him, he is still at fault. So, can the two of us sit down, sort things out, and distinguish right from wrong?

Cheng Lang knew that Li Boqiao would not do that, he loved him, but he was also very stubborn, as stubborn as he was.Cheng Lang was not afraid of reasoning, but it was obvious that Li Boqiao didn't want to reason with him, or he deliberately avoided foreseeable results.

Cheng Lang dragged himself onto the bed with heavy steps. His mind was as clear as the stars scattered in the night sky. He was oppressed and painful, and his thinking couldn't stop running at high speed, so his body obeyed the command of the brain center and became extremely active. Can't sleep.

He had to go to work tomorrow, Cheng Lang forced himself to fall asleep, but after turning over countless times, he just couldn't sleep at all.Cheng Lang opened his eyes wide,