flame chasing light

Chapter 40 Goodbye

The moment that person appeared, there was a snap, and the midnight shoe fell off.

When Xin Yan reacted, the man limped towards him, and the scar on his face made Xin Yan startled.When he came close, the scar-faced man said hoarsely, "Ah Xing, it's you, I know it's you, hehe, you looked a lot like your mother when you were young."

Xin Yan has not heard the name Ah Xing for many years, so there is no point in denying it. The road you have traveled and the things you have done have been engraved in your memory, and will never disappear over the years.

"A Xing, if you didn't still use your mother's surname, I wouldn't dare to recognize you, but I'm sure now, look, the scar on your left eyebrow is still there."

The scar on Xin Yan's left brow bone was left by him accidentally knocking on the edge of the table while helping his mother escape from a severe beating and scuffling with his stepfather.

The man continued, "What's wrong, we father and son haven't seen each other for more than ten years."

That year, in the small town of Shigu, what happened to the Li family caused a commotion.Human trafficker Li Linxi was stabbed several times by his stepson and was dying.Fortunately, the neighbor called the police, and he saved his life.Later, Li Linxi persisted in his bad habits and was caught selling children and sentenced to ten years in prison.Xin Yan never saw him again.

The lights dimmed, and the man waved at him, as before.In an instant, Xin Yan seemed to see the child from many years ago, hiding in a corner, covering his ears, and closing his eyes tightly, hoping that he could not hear or see, and stay away from the devil.

Xin Yan couldn't move, but the demon still came back. Li Linxi, that demon, has been buried in the deep memory, in the past that he wanted to forget countless times and cannot be repeated.

"More than ten years? Thirteen or four years, right? Thanks to your Uncle Liang, oh, the Liang Wei you caught two days ago, we got in touch again, thanks to him remembering you, and thanks to him Without him, we father and son will have the opportunity to meet again."

Liang Wei?Xin Yan remembered that it was when she felt strange that day, she felt right, that Liang Wei did hang out with Li Linxi for a while back then, and the two often drank together, how could they still be in touch now?Unexpectedly, he still remembered himself.

Regardless of the cold, Li Linxi lifted up the hem of his clothes, "Look, the wound you left me back then has become a scar, and it is said that the scar is a man's medal, right A Xing, or—Xin Detachment, which one should I call it? , do you like it better?" After finishing speaking, the man grinned, tearing the scars on his face so hideous.

"What do you want to do?" Xin Yan couldn't stop trembling, clenched his fists desperately to control.

"I didn't want to do anything. I heard from your Uncle Liang that I met someone who looked very similar to you. He specially asked me to take a look. I never thought it was really you. Why, don't you miss Dad at all?"

Xin Yan gritted his teeth and said a few words, "You are not my father."

"I'm married to your mother. She will be my wife until death. How can I not be your father?"

Xin Yan gritted her teeth, unable to speak.

"A Xing, are you going to get off work?" Li Linxi looked around, it was already dark, pedestrians passed by, and no one noticed the abnormality here. "It's past the time to eat, I haven't eaten yet, why don't you have a meal with me?"

Xin Yan growled, "What exactly do you want?"

"Oh, I forgot, you are now in Team Xin, you must be very busy with work, after all, there are too many villains. By the way, I have been in prison for ten years as a villain, and the atonement is enough."

Xin Yan knew that what he was talking about was atonement for the crime of abducting and selling children. "Ah Xing, don't worry, you can eat the meal next time, and I'll leave after I finish talking." Li Linxi curled her lips, "Your father and I want to move your mother to a place recently. The place where your mother lived before has to be demolished." It’s ridiculous to say that you want to build a house, haha, it’s just a piece of broken land where the dead live and the living live.”

Mother's cemetery is on a small hill, with the simplest stele. Every year after Qingming, Xin Yan would take a long car ride over to have a look, and quietly put a bouquet of flowers.Mom, don't blame me for remembering you only in this way.What, is it going to be demolished there?

The man continued, "But, you know, because I have lost the ability to work. I have been in a tight financial situation for many years. I have no money to change your mother to a better place. I suddenly heard about your letter. I came to you to discuss it." discuss."

The vicious man was spraying poisonous juice, Xin Yan interrupted him, "How much do you want!"

Li Linxi twisted his mouth and smiled, "My good son, you also know that the place where the dead live is more expensive than the living. Let's change your mother to a better place, and it will cost [-]."

This is a scoundrel, Xin Yan didn't intend to tangle with him, so he clenched his fists tighter, "Okay, I'll give it to you in three days."

"Okay, what a good son. I'll wait for your letter." After speaking, Li Linxi smiled.

"Li Linxi, get out of my sight as soon as you get the money, I have nothing to do with you."

"Don't worry, leave me alone in such a hurry, you have nothing to do with me, there is your mother in the middle, right?"

Xin Yan clenched his fists tightly, Li Linxi sank his face expressionlessly, patted him on the shoulder and walked away.

At this moment, Yu Ye came out from the inside and saw that Xin Yan was still in place, looking at the opposite side of the road.

"Boss, why haven't you left yet? Boss, boss." After calling a few times, Xin Yan came back to his senses.

"Boss, your complexion is not good, go back and rest quickly."

Xin Yan didn't make a sound, just nodded and left.

Hey, what's the matter, the boss is not in the right mood, why the chewing gum surnamed Gao didn't come today, thinking of this, Yu Ye couldn't help shaking his head, boss, why are you bothering.

Knowing that he was blackmailing, no matter what, he made a big mistake back then.Three days later, Xin Yan sold the car and gave Li Linxi money with all his belongings.Li Linxi was not polite at all, and took the money away.

Going home at night, Gao Zhan obviously felt that he was not in a good mood and didn't want to chat. He thought he was tired, so he warmed up milk for him, and went to bed with him early.Unexpectedly, in the middle of the night, the person in his arms suddenly woke up, and his back was covered in sweat.In the second half of the night, he kept trying to get into his arms, and it seemed that his body was not enough to stick to him, so Gao Zhan had no choice but to pat him to comfort him.

Gao Zhan asked him to see a doctor several times before but he refused, so Gao Zhan consulted a psychologist secretly.The doctor said that in addition to physical discomfort, a large factor of this behavior has something to do with growing up experience.The psychiatrist told him that many experiments have shown that the worldview and behavioral norms of adults can be found in the growth process.For minors, even if their cognition of the meaning of life has deviated from the right track, even if the processing they adopt will bring unstoppable mistakes, they will not change. This is from the self-consciousness of being human.Only by re-examining and correcting their own cognition will their understanding of life be changed. (@)

What happened to the upbringing?Gao Zhan was surprised by the question that popped into his head. He suddenly realized that apart from knowing that he took his mother's surname, his mother died in a car accident, and the family had no relatives. He didn't seem to know anything about him.Thinking about it carefully, he doesn't like to mention the past very much, as if deliberately avoiding it.

Xin Yan, what happened to you?Is insomnia also related to the past?Later, Gao Zhan asked him side-by-side, but he simply skipped it.

Seeing his sleep getting worse and worse, Gao Zhan was very worried. What was bothering him here? Gao Zhan wanted to find out the situation, but he didn't know where to start.

(@Viewpoint from Alfred Adler's "Inferiority and Transcendence")