dust in the chest

15

The sycamore trees on the side of the road are green and yellow, and the autumn wind blows and rests.In the blink of an eye, four years passed by in a hurry.

When Lu Jiaming waited for the red light, he looked out of the window, seeing the heavy traffic and strange lights.In a trance, I recalled the winter a few years ago, and I seemed to have watched the wind and clouds and people coming and going in the parking space.However, before he had time to think about it, the green light was already on.

People will never forget the things that have been deeply rooted in their bones, and some are just relieved and let go.When you go from thinking about that person 24 hours a day, to only thinking about that person for a few moments 365 days a year, it is probably relief.

It is so now, and it was so long ago.The half-day sweetness of the floating life that was stolen has already flowed along the mighty long river to a distant place that does not know where to go.

Lu Jiaming stood at the door for a while before taking the key to open the door.Luo Aileen lay on the sofa and turned on the TV. When he came back, she turned off the TV, went to the kitchen and brought out a bowl of lily and lotus seed porridge.

"I'm not hungry, so I don't need to make special preparations in the future." Lu Jiaming rubbed his temples tiredly and said.

"Whatever you want, the milk is in the microwave, drink it while it's hot, I'm going to bed." Loelin didn't seem disappointed either, and went to the bedroom after admonishing in a flat tone.

Lu Jiaming looked at the porridge that was still steaming, and after thinking about it, he picked it up and drank it.

After getting married, Lorraine would cook porridge for him every night for supper, mostly for health, and sometimes some weird porridge that no one had ever made.At the beginning, there was a lot of quarrel because of Lu Jiaming's cold reaction, but after a long time, he gradually let go of it.But the habit of making porridge every night has not changed. Lu Jiaming doesn't know what she is insisting on. Sometimes he feels that this porridge seems to be the bond that keeps them together. If they don't make it someday, this bond will be broken.

Lu Jiaming took a quick shower and went to the guest room to sleep.Before going to bed, he thought of Song Yanshu's face in a daze, and it disappeared in an instant wrapped in the wind.

In the dream that I didn't remember the next day, there were also scenes of the past.Probably only Luo Aileen, who got up to drink water at night, heard the sound of "Yan Shu" and "Yan Shu" at his door.

Some things are not mentioned, but they are not forgotten, but penetrated into everyone's heart in a more painful way.If you don't speak, I don't speak, and most of the spring and summer have passed.

In the morning it was Lu Jiaming's turn to send Maomao to school.After coaxing and coaxing, it was hard to get the little guy up, and when he was eating, he closed his eyes and asked, "Dad, why did you wake me up today?"

"Did you forget again? Dad sent you off today." Lu Jiaming smiled and rubbed his head, his heart suddenly softened.

Mao Mao is the son of Luo Aileen and Lu Jiayi, and both Luo Aileen and Lu Jiaming know it in their hearts, but Lu Jiayi met his current wife when he was in Europe, and Lu Jiaming had no choice but to marry Luo Aileen.The two of them kept this small secret until now.Maybe, just like this for a lifetime.

He actually likes Mao Mao very much, only when he is with him, he will not feel lost.So he is happy to play with Maomao after busy work.Seeing that he likes Maomao so much, the family feels relieved.

After delivering Mao Mao, he drove straight to NFC.After Lao Lu suffered a stroke a few years ago, he retired from the mall.Lu Jiaming naturally took his place, but the position of CEO has always been hanging.

No one knew what happened to Song Yanshu. Lu Jiaming wanted to visit his grandfather, but Luo Zhi said that his grandfather had passed away not long after his engagement.

It seems that there is a hand controlling everything in the dark, not even leaving him a chance to meet again.

After a long time, I became disheartened.But he didn't even have anyone to complain about, so he could only swallow his unwillingness in his mouth full of bitterness.

The secretary put the coffee and documents on the table, and seeing Lu Jiaming who came earlier than usual, he smiled and said, "Are you sending your son off today?"

Lu Jiaming smiled and responded.

Now he has learned to treat people and affairs gently and calmly, no matter in work or in life.Although it has not yet reached the state of not being happy with things and not saddening oneself, it is possible to be able to show emotions and anger.In fact, he doesn't have so many joys and sorrows. If you have seen the blue sea and the sky, then the clear springs and streams will not give you much shock.

Sometimes, Lu Jiaming would also think, how could a person just disappear out of thin air?Maybe it was a deliberate evasion?But why avoid it?

Maybe the once eager emotion was exhausted in that period of chaotic search, so now it is so cold-hearted and cold-hearted, and nothing can make a ripple in the heart.

That's it, it's nothing.

In the evening, Lu Jiaming took his secretary to a charity party, where the so-called high-class people gathered.On the way, I passed by the community where I lived a few years ago. I thought it seemed that the house was not for sale, so I asked the driver to stop the car and went upstairs to have a look.

When I got upstairs, I realized that I didn't bring the key. When I was about to leave, the door of the next room opened. It seemed that someone from the moving company was carrying the sofa out.

Is it finally sold?Lu Jiaming suddenly felt a emptiness in his heart.It seems that the past of the two of them has also been cleaned up and thrown out like this.

Lu Jiaming thought, it's better to throw away the key when we go back.No, new residents should be able to change the locks.Lu Jiaming smiled self-deprecatingly, and walked away.

Raise your glasses and make a cup of wine.Lu Jiaming walked freely through the crowd, and I heard that the boss of the financing company that was established a few years ago and has now flourished will also be present.

Norton Financing Lu Jiaming knows that 80% of companies need financing, so financing companies are particularly important in the business circle. Norton often takes direct loans, so the benefits are high.But this also means that there is huge financial support behind it, and it is not easy to come to this boss.

Lu Jiaming was about to eat some dessert to pad his stomach, when the crowd became commotion.The hostess, wearing an evening gown, announced gracefully: "Mr. Song, the CEO of Norton Finance, is invited to give a speech for our party today."

The feeling of being the focus of the crowd without flashing lights is about the same, and there are some whispers in the audience that are deliberately suppressed.Lu Jiaming didn't pay attention, the first time his eyes met the man, he couldn't take it back.

I haven't seen him for a few years, but he seems to be thinner, his hair is longer than before, his brows and eyes are more stern and calm, and the well-tailored suit makes him tall and handsome.Some are familiar, but more are unfamiliar.

Lu Jiaming once wondered whether Song Yanshu had passed away before he knew it, and this thought once made him extremely painful.Later, I felt that it was impossible, but it was just mediocrity.After that, he stopped searching, and he didn't know whether it was because of fear or because of giving up.

But now when he saw Song Yanshu again, he didn't have time to sort out his emotions, he just blankly followed every movement of that person with his heartbeat up and down.

The speech soon ended, and there was continuous applause from the audience.Lu Jiaming finally came back to his senses, it was as if an invisible balloon was hidden in his chest, which continued to inflate, making him unable to breathe.Seeing his pale face, the secretary asked in a low voice, "Mr. Lu, are you alright? Do you have a stomachache?"

During that time, when he was looking for Song Yanshu like crazy, he suffered from a stomach problem, which is why Luo Aileen cooked stomach porridge for him every day.

At first, I didn't think that what the secretary said seemed to have a dull pain in my stomach.I didn't eat dinner and drank wine again, my stomach can't stand such a toss now.

Lu Jiaming waved his hand and asked the secretary to bring him some food.The secretary was a little worried, and helped him to stand in a place where there were few people, and then walked away.

After Song Yanshu delivered his speech, he disappeared. Lu Jiaming couldn't tell whether he was disappointed or fortunate.Probably a combination of both, he still doesn't know how to treat the people who were once close.

A person who looked familiar came over and said mysteriously: "Oh, that one just now is Fu Qingjun's illegitimate son. After Fu Qingjun passed away a few years ago, he left him a sum of money. I heard that he is the same as his half-brother. Mother's younger brother...hehe, that's the thing anyway, you just need to understand it. Otherwise, the money Fu Qingjun left him wouldn't be able to support Norton, and that brother must be behind his back. Sigh, I didn't expect that even the man... ..."

Before he finished speaking, Lu Jiaming interrupted him coldly: "Sorry, I'm not feeling well right now."

Seeing that his complexion was indeed not very good, the man stopped talking embarrassingly, and left after a while.

"Lu Jiaming?" Turning his head in doubt, it turned out to be Brooklyn. He hadn't seen him for a few years. He had already shed his youthful aura and exuded a mature aura mixed with some imperceptible charm. .

"Ah, long time no see." Lu Jiaming put down his hand covering his stomach, and showed a kind smile.In fact, he doesn't hate Brooklyn, he did, and he still does.He always feels that if things are not good enough, it must have something to do with himself. It is better to introspect than to blame others.What's more, Brooklyn didn't do anything, just crazy about love.

"I heard you are married?"

"Well, it's been several years," Lu Jiaming asked after a while, "He... well, how is Song Yanshu?"

"Didn't you see it?" Brooklyn smiled, and said as if remembering something, "But it was really not very good at the beginning."

Before Lu Jiaming could ask what the phrase "it wasn't very good at first" meant, Brooklyn had already left. He followed his direction and saw Song Yanshu standing at the door.He didn't know if the other party saw him, because the gaze was too indifferent.

It's just so close to the world.

After eating what the secretary brought, my stomach felt much better.

Instead of going home at night, he took the key at the community management station and returned to the home he hadn't lived in for a long time.He used to come over when he remembered Song Yanshu, but most of them went to Song Yanshu's house, but he definitely couldn't go there now.

The room was quite clean. When I lived in Song Yanshu's place, I didn't care about it, but I never thought that after I couldn't live there, I would ask someone to come over and clean it every week.

Lu Jiaming suddenly remembered that Song Yanshu had given him a woodcut Maitreya before, but he couldn't remember where he put it.After rummaging through boxes and cabinets for a long time, I still couldn't find it.Maybe he lost it when he moved, he thought a little wistfully.

With the dimly lit wall lamp on, Lu Jiaming lay down on the bed.To be honest, after sleeping in so many beds, I still feel that the one at Song Yanshu’s next door is the most comfortable one. It’s moderately soft and hard, and it’s big enough. I really regret not asking what brand it is.

When she was drowsy, Lorraine sent a text message: Are you not coming back today?Then I'll send you the clothes tomorrow morning.

Lu Jiaming woke up and sat on the edge of the bed for a while.Hey, what is this nostalgia for?He sneered, turned off the lights, locked the door and left.

After opening the door, I found that the overhead light was still on. Even though I knew I was not going home, I still kept the light on.Lu Jiaming didn't know what to think, he felt a little sore, and walked lightly into the master bedroom.

At the moment, he heard Lorraine call out "Jiaming" in a crying voice.

But he was speechless, only thinking of Song Yanshu involuntarily at that moment.