Dog Licking's Way to Survive

Chapter 1

Shenxingyan is built next to the mountain, and the scenery is beautiful. As far as the cultivation world is concerned, the living habits of the disciples in the sect can be regarded as the standard. The situation every morning is probably...

"Farewell to Jiang! You fucking stole food again!" Jiang Yan picked up a kitchen knife and chased him out from the back kitchen.

Jiang Bie ran away with a bag full of food in his arms, feeling that he had run far enough, and he didn't forget to take down the chicken leg in his mouth with one free hand and turned back, "Chef Jiang, you have already built your foundation, it's time to bigu, Learn from Master to respect his old man, drink dew, don't eat things from us mortals, waste food!"

...well, it used to be the norm.

Jiang Bie, as a wonderful flower of stupidity, has successfully achieved the achievement of practicing qi for more than ten years and still staying at the fifth level.The so-called stinky fish smells like a pot of soup, Jiang Bie is like a mudslide in the cultivation world, which has wiped a huge stain on Shenxingyan.

Jiang Yan frowned, and swung the kitchen knife out with the force of his arm, brushed Jiang Bie's crotch, and nailed it to the wall in front of Jiang Bie with a "bang".

"You old boy!" Jiang Bie was taken aback, turned around and said, "I'll steal one of your chickens, and you want to cut mine off?"

"Didn't you cut it off?" Jiang Yan pulled out the kitchen knife regretfully, "That's because I didn't know how to measure."

"Yes, yes, yes, don't be stupid for a day, and do things wisely..." Jiang Bie suddenly realized half of what he said, "Who is short of the old boy!"

Jiang Yan picked up Jiang Bie by the back of his neck with a kitchen knife, and his eyes were fierce, "I let you steal all the good things I saved every month. You, Grandpa Jiang, I'm going to cut you up today. Let the disciples of Shenxingyan also eat meat."

Jiang Bie tightened his neck in fright, and waved wildly behind Jiang Yan with his hands and feet: "Master, please take care of Senior Brother Jiang! Senior Brother Jiang is possessed! He wants to cut my blood sacrifice!"

"Nonsense!" Jiang Yan glared at Jiang Bie, "Little Pug, don't use Master to suppress me. Master doesn't even bother to get off the ground, so he doesn't bother to come here."

"Jiang Yan." Master's voice.

Jiang Yan: "..."

"I told you that you don't believe me." Jiang Bie murmured, slipped out from under Jiang Yan's kitchen knife like a mouse, leaned over to Lou Qingchen's side, flatteringly said: "Master, why did you get up so early today? But do you have an order?"

Lou Qingchen didn't change his face: "Serve the teacher to go to the toilet."

"Master respects me..."

Lou Qingchen glanced at Jiang Bie silently, and Jiang Bie immediately said, "I am very happy to serve you. It is my honor that you trust me so much."

However, Jiang Bie complained frantically in his heart: Boss, do you have any special hobbies?Even if I don't dislike it, it's okay for Lou Qingchen, a big man, to be so lazy that he can't wait for someone to help ** to go to the toilet.Fortunately, he is a man, otherwise Jiang Bie would have misunderstood Lou Qingchen's unspoken rules.

Jiang Bie respectfully sent his master, who was so lazy that he almost had severe dementia, back to bed.Although she was smiling all the time, she was already scolding her in her heart.What kind of mudslide is he? Shenxingyan looks decent on the outside, but in fact, all of them are black and scum!

Especially Lou Qingchen.As the head of Shenxingyan, he naturally has unparalleled beauty and otherworldly temperament. He grinds black eyebrows, grinds ice into skin, and has fluttering clothes. representatives of the world.

However, this person has a lot of gold and jade on the outside, but he has a stinking problem behind his back. He is hypocritical, narcissistic and has a poisonous tongue. The biggest shortcoming is his laziness.To be extraordinarily lazy is to be extraordinarily lazy, to the point where you are too lazy to eat, drink, and scatter.

According to Senior Brother Yan, when Lou Qingchen heard that he didn't have to eat after cultivating Immortal Bigu, he directly cultivated to the Nascent Soul Stage Dzogchen in one breath, and was once praised as a genius by the cultivation world.

After bigu, Lou Qingchen really stopped eating, and occasionally drank some dew like a little fairy, which is called absorbing the essence of heaven and earth.All of these things are ridiculously lazy.

When Jiang Bie first started, in order to hold his thighs, he racked his brains to climb up to the seat of the disciple.At that time, he was ready to fight hard against his previous disciple, Senior Brother Yan, but after knowing that Jiang Biewan was a disciple, he was so moved that he almost knelt down to thank him, and immediately gave up the seat that seemed close to the water. him.

At that time, Jiang Bie was still doubtful, but now, he only hopes that another guy who knows nothing about his heights and depths will come to replace him soon!It's really hard for Senior Brother Yan to endure Lou Qingchen for so many years while managing the affairs inside the door.

Speaking of Senior Brother Yan, what happened today...

"Chef Jiang, where is Senior Brother Yan?" Jiang Bie asked Jiang Yan who was kneeling at the door.

Jiang Yan was kneeling pitifully in the yard with a water tank above his head to be punished, and Lou Qingchen said that Jiang Yan had violated the rules of the house that delayed his relief.

Although Jiang Bu didn't know if Shenxingyan was really bored enough to write the solution on the door regulations, but Lou Qingchen was definitely too lazy to remember.Shenxingyan's sect rules have always depended on the head of the sect to talk nonsense temporarily, and Lou Qingchen can mess with whoever he wants.

Jiang Yan was obviously also upset, and he was taken aback when he heard Jiang Bie's question: "Senior Brother Yan? The third meeting day is coming, and Senior Brother Yan has gone down the mountain to catch the little uncle."

At this time, in Lujia Village at the foot of the mountain, all the people in the village gathered in front of the graveyard on the mountain, staring closely at a Taoist priest performing a ritual.

Lujia Village is located at the foot of the mountain, with little sunshine and poor grains. In the half-sized village, almost all the people go up the mountain to hunt for a living.

But it was rumored that the tombs on the mountain were haunted recently, and ghosts crying and howling wolves could often be heard in the middle of the night.Although no human life was involved, the whole village pointed to the mountain for dinner.After much deliberation, the people in the village finally decided to invite a Taoist priest to do a ritual.

The invited Taoist priest had a goatee and was so thin that his feet were lonely.Wearing a yellow Taoist robe, holding a mahogany sword covered with yellow talismans, stepping on the seven-star step while muttering.

Daotong on both sides held candles and sprinkled paper money, and the flickering candles illuminated Daotong's face in a confusing manner.The villagers watching around stared at the goatee.A gust of wind blew by, and the scattered paper money floated away in circles on the ground, making people feel chills.

"Crack." As if in response to the occasion, a dry hand stretched out from the soil, with long and curved nails.

Everyone was so scared that they retreated in a swarm, leaving a goatee in front of them all at once.

Goatee gulped and spit, his posture of holding the mahogany sword changed shape, his legs trembled, and he said in a trembling voice: "I am a disciple of Youyou Valley, you, you, don't act foolishly..."

Before he finished speaking, his dry hands got up with the whole mummy, and started to move slowly.

"Ah—" Goatee was so frightened that he pissed off, dropped the mahogany sword and ran away.He just wanted to take the opportunity to fool some money, but he didn't expect to meet a real old bacon.

When everyone saw the goatee running away, they all dispersed with a "wow".

After everyone left, the mummy moved, and a whisk with a red sandalwood handle flew out and stuck it on the ground, and then Cui Jingyan crawled out of the grave carrying the mummy: "Trash, just these two brushes dare to come out to shame people!" Now."

Cui Jingyan arranged the mummy, took out a pill and stuffed it into the mummy's mouth, and then did something to the mummy.After a while, black blood flowed out from the seven orifices of the mummy, a little seeped.

Cui Jingyan quickly opened the mummy's mouth, took out a puddle of cotton wool, and stuffed it into the silk pocket on his waist in disgust.

"Help me, someone help me."

Cui Jingyan buried the mummy back in the grave, and just as he was about to leave, he heard a cry for help.

who cares.Cui Jingyan pretended not to hear it at all. At this time, all the foxes who can live in the mountains are thousand-year-old foxes. Why are they still playing Liaozhai?

"Is anyone there? Help me, help me."

No, the voice sounds like a woman.

Cui Jingyan followed the sound and found a woman sitting on the ground crying, her leg stuck in a crack in the stone.It seemed that he got stuck in a panic when he was running away just now.

The woman heard someone and looked back.

This look is amazing, it's so beautiful, this woman looks so good-looking.

A pair of affectionate eyes, two crescent eyebrows.The skin is like ice and snow, and the lips are like cinnabar in the mouth.There are two cinnabar moles lined up between the eyebrows, the first one is slightly larger, like a red bean, and the next one is slightly smaller, like a grain of rice.Undiminished gentleness, adding to the beauty.

This girl's appearance is too suitable for Cui Jingyan's appetite, and she doesn't care about ghosts and snakes. She died under the peony flower, and being a ghost is also flirtatious.

Cui Jingyan politely did not look directly at the girl, straightened his clothes, dusted off some powder, and stepped forward with a perfect smile: "May I help you?"

Cui Jingyan, as a gentle scum, has a kind of coquettishness of the son of aristocratic family in his speech and demeanor.But helplessly, Cui Jingyan's slender eyebrows and long eyes are not upright enough, and he smiles like a big fluffy fox, always carrying an unconcealable obscenity in his flair.But it's this kind of style that can die if you don't flirt with peach blossoms in your eyes, and you can always fool a bunch of big girls and young wives around him.

Sure enough, the girl couldn't escape Cui Jingyan's clutches, she blushed, lowered her head, and mumbled, "The little girl lives in Lu's Village, and just accidentally got her leg stuck in a rock and hurt her, and she can't move. Going down the mountain, I don’t know how to get back. Please do me a favor, Master Immortal, and help the little girl.”

Cui Jingyan was just waiting for this sentence, nodded slightly, and said quite gracefully: "If the girl doesn't dislike it, I am willing to give the girl a ride."

Cui Jingyan helped the girl into the carriage.Along the way, Cui Jingyan fully demonstrated the self-cultivation that a well-dressed beast should have, dignified and dignified at the same time not forgetting five sentences and one flirt.The teasing was just right, deep but not abrupt, not too embarrassing for the girl, but also for the girl to understand the wretched idea of ​​"I just want to fuck you". There was an air of distraction in the carriage.

However, Cui Jingyan was still wary of the girl.

Seeing that the carriage was about to leave Lujia Village, Cui Jingyan couldn't help being suspicious, and pretended to be casual, and asked: "May I ask which family the girl lives in?"

The girl tilted her head and smiled, the bright cinnabar mole between her eyebrows made Cui Jingyan a little distracted.

"The immortal master has heard of Daiyun Mountain and Shenxing Rock."

God Walking Rock!I knew there was no such cheap peach blossom!Cui Jingyan felt something was wrong, and was about to turn around and jump out of the car to escape, but his arm was suddenly wrapped tightly by a snake-like thing—it was a whip, and the other end of the whip was in the girl's hand.

The girl pulled the whip tightly, dragged Cui Jingyan out of the car, and tied him into a solid ball.

"Wu Gurou." Cui Jingyan didn't intend to fight back, he looked at the whip and said, "Can I ask the girl's name?"

"I'm the chief disciple of Shenxing Rock, Yan Zixiao." A male voice came from the girl's voice: "Master, did you forget about me?"

male?male!Cui Jingyan looked Yan Zixiao over, and an ominous premonition arose spontaneously: "Are you... Ayan?"

With Yan Zixiao's confirmation, Cui Jingyan instantly recalled the fear of being dominated by Yan Zixiao.

Back then, Cui Jingyan had taken a fancy to Yan Zixiao among a bunch of children, so he asked for it from Lou Qingchen with a shameless face.Although Cui Jingyan is not good at molesting children, but Yan Zixiao is good-looking, and he likes it just by looking at it.What's more, the remnants of the demon cultivator hadn't disappeared at that time, so it wasn't a bad idea to be by Cui Jingyan's side.As a friend of women, Cui Jingyan resolutely shoulders this heavy task - raises Yan Zixiao like a baby, eats at the same table, sleeps together, and is reluctant to let others take a second look.

Just one morning, when Cui Jingyan encountered the thing bigger than himself propped up between Yan Zixiao's legs in his sleep, Cui Jingyan immediately collapsed.Immediately picked up the sleeping Yan Zixiao and checked it from beginning to end, then he was ashamed and left, never to return.

What a shame!Cui Jingyan wished he could find an old crooked neck tree and hang himself to death.Thinking that he has been in the wind and moon field for decades, but he can't tell the difference between men and women, and falls on this little bastard. Is there anything more embarrassing than this?

As it turns out, there is.

Decades later, this little bastard named Yan Zixiao dressed up and swayed in front of him, and he was still hooked.On how a man hanged from the same tree?

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